My Little Boy

Be prepared for a mushy post. You have been warned.

My little boy, full of wonder, curiosity, is also the most loving and empathetic little boy that I've ever known. The last few days, I've felt so lucky to be the recipient of his love and I could help but to share it with whomever would listen.

I've got cerebral palsy that affects my left side and has resulted in, what my kids call, my "closed" hand. They fought over holding my hand. Then I told them the story of how I knew that Daddy was "the one":

No one had ever held my left hand before....until Blair. He was the first one to reach for my left hand and hold it as if it were no big deal.

After that story, Nicholas asks to hold my "closed" hand because, in his words, "that means that I am special like Daddy" and reminds me of the story almost every time he holds my hand.

The other day, I picked Nicholas up at school on Friday and while his sister played in the playground, Nicholas hugged me and said "Mommy, I'm going to marry you."
Me: "I'm already married to Daddy"
Nicholas: "Well, I'm going to live with you forever. I'm in your heart and your heart is always with you."

Nicholas, dressed up as "Geronimo Stilton"

I just kissed his forehead. A mom sitting nearby, said "I'm sorry for listening in, but that is the sweetest thing"

A few minutes later, Nicholas was running around the edge of the playground and slipped and fell, hitting his head on the cement. Other moms asked him if he was OK and he nodded until I got to him and then he started to cry and said "I was pretending I was an X-wing being chased by the Death Star and I was supposed to stay on track, but instead I wiped out."

And then there is this morning. I walked him to school, just the two of us. He held my hand and we talked all the way there. Standing outside his classroom, he hugged me and said "I love you Mommy"

My sweet, silly  little boy

Please, don't get me wrong, there are many times when Nicholas is talking constantly and I ask "for just 5 minutes". But when I think about Nicholas, I imagine him as a young man with a girlfriend and I think about how lucky the girl who get him will be. He will love her and cherish her and she will never wonder how much she is loved by him.

All Good Things Must Come To An End

Well, a lot has happened since my last post back in November. As I sit here on the eve of the last day of Christmas break, I am reflecting on the past couple of months and looking ahead to the future. Here's whats happened since my last post:

:I made it through the first term of school after being off for a year and even though I am not enjoying my time teaching, I am learning a lot about myself and how to do things differently in the future.

:Nicholas got his first report card and it was stellar. He LOVES school and is excelling more than I ever expected. It is something to hear my little boy reading signs and books to me. Incredible :)

:We had a quiet Christmas with just family and with Blair taking the two weeks for holiday, we were able to spend some really good quality time together.

:I even took a break from FACEBOOK (something I plan to do more often).

:We took nightly walks around the neighbourhood looking at all the Christmas lights.

:We went to the aquarium to see the "Luminescence" and the penguins.

:We went on a "journey" (as Claire calls it) the "Bright Night's at Stanley Park" and had a picnic in the car on the way home.

:I started to read a book, for pleasure

:Blair and I slept in and enjoyed each other's company after the kids went to bed. We drank a lot of wine during these past two weeks and watched some shows we wanted to see.

I really wish it didn't have to end, but as with all good things, this holiday must too end. So, tomorrow, I head back to teaching (something I wish I was looking forward to more), Blair heads back to the office and the kids head back to daycare and school.
Unlike years past where I would list off all the things I wanted to do in the "new year", I haven't done that. Instead, I've decided to enjoy spending time with my family, try to do more for myself, to make me feel better about me and to do the best I can at my job and hopefully find the joy that I once had for it, or find joy elsewhere (aside from my family; children).
I am looking forward to reading more with Nicholas, watching Claire dance in her ballet class and Emily growing, changing and talking.
I am also looking forward to Tofino at Spring Break ;)

'Til next time.......