Claire turns 5

Where did the time go? March 10th marks the fifth birthday of our oldest daughter, Claire. I cannot believe that its been five years since she was born in her own way on her own terms. I should have known then, that she would be a girl with a mind of her own.

On the one hand, she is a loving little girl, who loves her baby dolls and playing "Mommy" and "house", on the other hand, she is a strong-willed, determined little girl, who, argues when things are not fair and tries to keep up with her big brother. She loves to perform songs; right now "Frozen" up in her room, singing at the top of her lungs with such abandon that she doesn't care who is listening. I love that about her.

Claire and I often find ourselves in a kind of "battle of wills", something I'm told is because we are two sides of the same coin. I, of course, deny this. Of all my three children, I am told that Claire resembles me the most, both in looks and personality. Part of that is true, but the part where we differ is the ability to talk. While I am more the introvert, observer, speak when spoken to, Claire will talk non-stop. I do mean non stop. When she was 18 months old, she wasn't talking and it was suggested that we take her to a speech therapist to have her checked out. We chalked it up to her having an older brother who spoke for her and put it out of our mind. Sure enough, two weeks later, Claire started talking and hasn't stopped since. She will talk from the moment her eyes open in the morning, till they close at night. She talks through movies, offering a running commentary for those watching with her, talks as she walks to the store. So far, the only place that I think she is quiet is the hairdresser's chair. She speaks nary a word while in the chair, but as soon as we leave the salon, the talking starts again.

Claire's world revolves around her Daddy. Anywhere he goes, she wants to go. She is up and ready to go anytime and anywhere he is going and is right put off when he says he needs to go alone. I love the relationship that they have and hope it never changes.

Claire has brought such joy, love and laughter to our lives. Thank you Claire, for being you.

Happy Birthday, Claire! I love you.

Claire at one month

Claire at one month

Claire as a newborn

Claire in November 2013

Claire (and Emily) in February 2014

Another Check Off the List

For the past year, I have been waiting for breast reduction surgery to help alleviate the back, shoulder and neck pain that has plagued me since my children were born. I was on the wait list for a year and at the end of January I received a  call saying that a date had come up for February 7th. Two weeks. I took the date, afraid that I'd wait indefinitely for another date to come up and I didn't want to wait. Up until this point, I was taking ibuprofen every night to deal with the pain in my next, back and shoulders. So, I got prepared for surgery. Informed my principal and the school board, filled out all the necessary paperwork and planned for my replacement. It was a whirlwind two weeks, but it got done and early on Friday, February 7th, I went to Abbotsford Hospital for my day surgery and the first step in reclaiming my health.

It's been almost three weeks since I had the surgery and I am recovery well. One side, my left is healing better than the other, but that is because I do most things with my right hand and arm. Its to be expected. I'm still not supposed to lift anything over 10lbs (meaning my children)and reaching up high is on the "no" list. My incisions are still tender, particularly underneath, meaning that I am not able to wear a bra; just a gauze wrap bandage and support padding. I am glad that I did this, not only for the pain issues, but also to help my body image. I still tire easily, but try to get out and walk for both exercise and fresh air. I have to admit that I like being home and could get used to this. I get to walk Nicholas to school every day, which I really love and read more than a chapter of a book during the day.

This is another thing checked off my list. Next up? Getting ready to do a "walk to run" program. By this time next year, I hope to be a healthier version of myself. But right now I'm just taking one day at a  time.

Good bye 2013, Hello 2014

At the end of every month, Nicholas and I do a ritual. We turn the page on the calendar and say, with expression "Goodbye(name of the outgoing month), hello (incoming month)." On January 1st, we change the calendar and say "Good bye 2013, hello 2014". It sounds so cliche, but on every New Years Eve, I do what most people do and reflect on the year that is ending and think about the year ahead.

Overall, 2013 was a good year. I worked my second year at the same school, (albeit yet another grade change, but I've learned to appreciate the fact that I have a job) and moved from the portable to a classroom inside the school building. Nicholas had a great first year of school and started off Grade One on a high point. Blair had a good year in his work and we got ourselves back on a good financial track. Claire is becoming her own person, strong, not so brave, but independent. I am so proud of the person she is. Emily is growing like a weed and trying her hardest to keep up with her brother and sister. As I write this, she is playing a letter game on the ipad and actually recognizes some letters. Did I mention she's just 2 years old? I am so curious to see how she will change this next year.
On the "not so good" of 2013, there were things that I had wished I'd handled better, but as with everything, I have learned from them. I hope to do better in 2014. To quote Oprah "....you are responsible for your life, but doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment."

As we begin 2014, I think ahead to what's in store for us. First of all, this year, Claire turns 5 and heads to Kindergarten in the Fall. That, in itself is HUGE. How did that happen? How did I become the mom of two school aged children?? Not only will Claire start school, but she will also start soccer and so begins our weekends on the soccer pitch. I will officially become a soccer mom....with the mini van to match. One hope I have for this year is that I get a job at our local school. To be able to walk to school with my children and have them come to my class at the end of the day, is something both I and our bank account will be grateful for.

This is also the year that I hope to put an end to my back and shoulder pain with a much needed surgery. After four pregnancies and three children in six years, my body has been put through the ringer and need of some TLC. I hope that this surgery will help to get my physical life back on track. With my body back on the right track, I hope that my body image will improve and I can be a positive role model for my two young daughters.

I have a lot of hope for this year and as I reflect on the year that was, I am grateful for the lessons I've learned and, as I look ahead to the future, I am hopeful. 

Happy New Year!